When the Spiritual Community Starts Sounding Like a Cult

Let’s be honest.The spiritual community isn’t always the soft, welcoming place it claims to be. Especially when you’re new.

I remember stepping into these spaces thinking, “Finally, no labels, no judgment, just growth.”But what I found was something else: opinions disguised as facts, egos fighting for center stage, and a weird obsession with being the most “right” or the most “gifted.”

People will tell you don’t do this, don’t work with that, don’t say this word, don’t cast that spell. And it’s not coming from curiosity, it’s coming from fear, hierarchy, or regurgitated teachings they’ve never questioned themselves.

And that’s the problem.

Because if all we do is repeat what someone else said in a Facebook group or a spiritual Zoom call… how are we evolving?

The 9 of Wands I pulled for this post says it all. We’re tired. Guarded. Still showing up, but weary. Not because Spirit failed us, but because the community built around Spirit has become more about walls than windows.

I’m not here to tear anything down. I’m here to open the door.

Because if spirituality doesn’t leave room for growth, questioning, and personal truth, what even is it?

I can tell you what it is: it starts looking a whole lot like a religion.

And that’s ironic, isn’t it? 

Because the whole point of modern spirituality was to break away from dogma. To find freedom from institutions that told us how to think, pray, or connect with the divine.

The idea of “spirituality” as a separate path really started to rise during the 1960s and 70s, as people began questioning traditional religion and searching for deeper, personal truth. It pulled from ancient mysticism, indigenous wisdom, Eastern philosophy, and esoteric practices, but it wasn’t supposed to become a new system of control.

It was supposed to be a space for inner knowing. But lately, I’ve seen it twist into something that looks more like gatekeeping with prettier branding.

So… how do we protect ourselves?

Especially if we’re naturally trusting, empathic, or just trying to find something real?

That question hits home, because I used to be one of those people. Not gullible,  just human. I believed what others told me, not because I lacked intuition, but because I assumed they followed the same rule I did:

Don’t speak unless you’re certain.

I gave people the benefit of the doubt, assuming they were just as thoughtful with their words as I was.

But then life happened.

Dating a narcissist for six years on and off will teach you things you never wanted to learn, like how easy it is for someone to say all the right things while meaning none of them. Existing in this world teaches you the rest.

And one of the hardest truths I’ve had to accept?

Most people talk more out of their ass than their mouth.

It’s unfortunate, really,  but it makes sense. Talking from ego is easy. Speaking from truth? That’s the hard part.

Because truth forces you to know yourself. It makes decision-making heavier, more sacred. You carry the weight of awareness. You can’t hide behind ignorance or trends.

Truth demands self-responsibility. It requires shadow work. And most people are too caught up in surviving their day-to-day to face their soul.

The Medicine? Stay Curious.

Here’s what I’ve come to believe, and confirmed through tarot, time, and my own healing:

We need to return to childlike curiosity.

As kids, we questioned everything. We felt through life. We were in the moment, even if we were whining or acting out, we were present. We were honest about what we needed. We asked a thousand questions. We listened, observed, touched, explored.

That energy is what keeps us grounded in our own truth, especially when the outside noise gets loud.

So I asked Spirit: Does childlike curiosity help us stay present and protected?

• Queen of Cups – Yes. She’s the inner child grown wise. This card speaks of emotional awareness, intuition, and nurturing self-trust. She says curiosity protects us by keeping our hearts open but not naïve.

• 6 of Wands Reversed – A reminder: curiosity is not about performing for approval. Stay away from the spiritual ego trap of needing to "win" with your insights.

• 8 of Wands Reversed – Slow down. Curiosity loses its magic when we rush. Presence can’t be forced. It’s found when we pause, ask, and listen.

Final message from Spirit:

“Yes,  stay curious. But stay slow. That’s where the truth can find you.”

So no,  I’m not here to tell you what to believe. I’m here to remind you that you already know. And when it gets noisy, when others speak with too much certainty, come back to that child part of you who wonders instead of obeys.

Because that’s the part of you that will always, always lead you home.